A CALMER SENSE OF BEING

Have you ever taken the time to observe a naturally calm person? They’re a sight to behold: The way they glide through the day with ease, joy, and quiet confidence. A calm mind is something many of us seek during moments of frustration and anxiety. When something unexpected comes our way, we can only hope that we’ll handle it with grace and dignity. Knowing how to stay calm in moments of frustration and anxiety is important to reduce this negative reactivity and help you become a calmer, more collected person. In this post, we’ll cover three techniques that can help you feel more calm and in control during stressful moments! If we are not in a calm state of mind, we are more likely to react irrationally and perhaps regret our actions later.

They are some tips to be a calmer person

Give yourself a mental break
The first thing to do if something comes your way unexpectedly and throws you off is to remove yourself from the situation instead of immediately responding. Doing something that gets you out of your current headspace is a good way to get perspective on the situation. Often we feel so overwhelmed because we think we need to respond or react to something right away, but this only adds to the stress. Instead, take a moment to look objectively at the situation before rushing into anything. Whether that’s going for a walk, meditating, watching funny videos, or listening to music, distract yourself so that you can come back to whatever’s stressing you out with clarity.
Don’t act upon every thought

Another way to reduce reactivity is to practice meditation. Those of us who are overthinkers or worriers tend to resist meditation because we assume meditation involves stopping our thoughts. In actuality, meditation helps prevent you from reacting to your thoughts. When ideas and thoughts are floating through our heads, our instinct is to react to act upon them right away or add them to our never-ending to-do lists.
Meditation teaches us to let our thoughts come without the pressure that we need to act on them.

Get in touch with your senses

The next time you’re in a stressful situation and you feel like anxiety is taking over, try a simple grounding exercise to bring awareness to what’s going on around you. One of my favorite exercises for this is the 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 grounding method. Simply focus around you and bring attention to:

  • 5 things you can see
  • 4 things you can touch
  • 3 things you can hear
  • 2 things you can smell
  • 1 thing you can taste

This is a great technique to distract you from the stressful situation and bring your focus to your surroundings and the current moment.

Things Calm People Do

Get in touch with your senses

If you want to feel calmer, try acting as a calm person would. Calm people:

Deal with problems as they happen
Calm people don’t endlessly anticipate problems. They promptly deal with problems once they occur rather than putting off handling issues. People who are bad at coping with stress tend to do a lot of worrying about problems before they happen, and then avoid dealing with problems that have actually occurred.

  • Treat themselves kindly
    Calm people don’t beat up on themselves about their mistakes or weaknesses.
  • Take bad luck in stride
    Calm people know that life will have ups and downs. They believe in their capacity to cope with bad luck and occasional things that go wrong.
  • Stop and smell the roses
    Calm people pause to savor their successes and the good things they have in their life. Recognize that other people sometimes behave weirdly
    Calm people don’t overthink it when other people act strangely towards them. For example, if someone is a bit rude, they don’t assume it must be due to something they’ve done.
  • Cut other people some slack
    Calm people don’t beat themselves up about their own mistakes and they also don’t set unattainable standards for others. They expect that even when other people do their best, there will sometimes be glitches.
  • See the middle ground
    Calm people look for middle ground options rather than being all or nothing. For example, if they don’t have time to do all of a task, they’ll do a little bit rather than avoid getting started
  • Stay active even when they’re feeling down
    Calm people will stay active when they’re feeling down. They won’t let five days of dishes build up. They know that they need to give themselves some emotional space to recover from sadness and disappointment, but they don’t go into complete sloth mode or cut themselves off from other people.
  • React in proportion to events
    Calm people distinguish between genuine catastrophes and small blips or frustrations. They don’t make mountains out of molehills.
  • Take time to chill
    Calm people utilize their downtime for relaxing rather than stuffing every spare minute with work—or spending their downtime worrying about the next thing that could do wrong.

Easy ways to become a happier and calmer person
That’s where these simple tips come into play. Below are just a few techniques that will help you manage overwhelming bouts of stress next year, which will effectively make you a calmer and happier human being.

Just breathe

Your body already has a built-in stress fighter: Your mind and your lungs.
In addition to focusing on your breath, try “grounding” yourself by taking stock of your surroundings and engaging your five senses. Tell yourself “I feel my feet are planted on the ground,” “I hear the television is on in the background” or whatever else you’re noticing about the present moment. This may help ease your stress.

Go for a walk outside at least once a week
Exercise ― even if it’s just walking ― can affect your mental health in profound ways. But you may be missing out on a few added perks by keeping your workout indoors. Research shows taking a walk in nature can alleviate depressive symptoms and significantly increase your mood. There’s something to be said for a little sunshine with your stroll.
Try new experiences
Forget retail therapy ― try adventure therapy. Studies show that spending money on experiences over material items will bring greater joy. Make this year you see your favorite band live or try zip lining. You’ll be happier for it.
Keep a gratitude journal
Or any journal, for that matter. Research suggests writing down negative thoughts can help clear your mind and jotting the things you appreciate can help improve your mental well-being.
Give therapy a shot
There’s nothing wrong with seeking mental health support. Experts agree that talk therapy is incredibly beneficial to sorting through and managing any negative emotions or behavioral health issues.
And if you’re feeling weary of talking to someone face to face, online services like Crisis Text Line can also be a way for you to sort out what’s going on with your psychological well-being. There’s no wrong starter method when it comes to finding professional help.
Make a mental health playlist
When you’re feeling anxious, just press play. Research indicates that a specific tune may reduce your anxiety by up to 65 percent, Inc. reported.
Go to bed an hour earlier
Sleep is a magical elixir when it comes to mental health. Research shows that late sleep can make it difficult to regulate emotions and make you more irritable. Not to mention too little rest can lead to physical health setbacks.
Try cutting down on alcohol
Sure, a good glass of red at the end of a long day is one thing. But too many gin and tonics after a rough work week ― and the subsequent hangover ― may not be doing anyone any favors when it comes to psychological health. Some research suggests that heavy drinking can lead to an increase in anxiety.
Cut out toxic people
It’s one thing if your good pal is going through a rough time and you’re there to help them through it. It’s another thing to be around someone who is constantly stressed over every single situation. It could be hurting your well-being: Research shows stress is contagious. The good news? So is happiness. Choose your squad wisely.
Just perform a random act of kindness
Paying it forward can go a long way. Purchase a stranger’s coffee, take a mentor out to lunch or just hold the door open for someone who clearly needs a little help. Research even shows that it can boost your mood and compel you perform more acts of kindness.
“Putting love out in the world is an amazing way to help someone else ― and you ― feel happy,” Liz Eddy
Allow yourself to feel sad
Yep, you read that correctly. Human beings experience a spectrum of emotions and each one deserves attention. Research shows that crying can be cathartic and allow you to process whatever is upsetting you better. Grab those tissues and let it flow.
Plan a vacation
The act of anticipation is just as much of a reward as the vacation itself. Research suggests that planning a trip can increase your happiness. It doesn’t matter if it’s a weekend adventure or an excuse to use up your vacation days, start looking into hitting the road.
Recite self affirmations
Inner dialogues can be incredibly brutal. But promising research shows that self affirmations ― or the act of focusing on your strengths and what you value ― can help combat some of the negativity your brain tends to churn out.
For example, are you a creative type? Think about how you discovered that and the ways you’ve expressed your creativity in the past. Experts say this technique has a way of buffering you against stress and gets you thinking about items that feed into a positive sense of self.
Give yourself a break
So often human beings put pressure on themselves to “do it all,” which can lead to burnout and guilt. You’re your own worst critic. Cut yourself some slack next year and start accepting yourself wholly (research shows it’s the key to a happier life, but a habit many rarely practice). Sooner or later you’ll be on your way to being more exuberant and tranquil.

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